clocks children

clocks children

That Damn Ticking Clock

Dr. Dennis,

 

So I am about to turn 33. I’m financially stable and have a great career. But when it comes to dating I don't feel like I’ve found the "1" so I am starting to think about having a baby on my own... scary. I know it's not the ideal idea. Trust me, I imagined having met Mr. Amazing and fell in love. But, as I got more self sufficient I got more picky. I'd like someone who can love me for me. I didn't need to put up with guys treating me badly ...I want a child though and my clock is ticking... Is that so bad?

So I went to your site to see what it's like to date once you have a child and was blown away!! You've described women with children (with the first word as DON'T) who are looking for a father, health insurance, gold diggers... wow.

 

There's a whole generation out there that loves and wants children without any strings attached. I am disappointed with your biased opinion of women. I'm sure that type does exist... but the last thing I'll need is someone paying my bills...as many women in their 30s are starting to face this dilemma of do you go ahead and have a child if it’s something you really truly want??... Please be more aware of their choices and why they are making them. God forbid they are actually looking for a great partner and companionship. Not someone who can drive car-pool. Remember girl, some of us can afford to have children on our own and are happy with their decision.

 

 

 

Hello!

 

Thanks for your comments.

 

I'm not entirely sure where to start with you, so I'll just dive right in:

 

First of all, that old chestnut "I want someone that can love ME for ME" translates to: "I don't want to have to bring anything to my relationship. I don't want to have to grow or change or BE anything in particular for my partner. I just want to get - to take - without any strings attached. Then, when things don't work out exactly as I want them too or if I get angry or upset by anything, I can just up and leave. After all, I TOLD the guy that I just wanted someone to love ME for ME!"

 

Really, what the hell? If you seriously think this is what you want, NO WONDER you can't find a good man! You're in it entirely for you (more proof to follow) and have nothing to offer any man! So what - you can feed and clothe yourself. Big fucking deal! You're only going to attract men that are in it for themselves too. It almost seems like the perfect match!

 

Regarding children: here are just some of the problems:

 

First, it's just more selfishness on your part. Consider this: children don't ask to be born, it's based on some adult (sometimes even TWO!) that selfishly want a carbon-copy of themselves. They imagine all the attention they'll get walking around with that little living doll that they get to dress up and will re-make them into the perfect image of humanity: themselves.

 

The problem with this is that children will only put up with this for a year or so until they begin to realize that they aren't little play-things. They have a sense of self and even believe they have "rights". Then the "terrible two's and three's and four's" kick in and it's only downhill from there! By six or seven, they'll be expecting cell phones and trips to Europe!

 

Next, you just want to have kids because you want them, not because it's the best thing for the kid at all! Study after study continues to show that children raised in a single-parent household are far, FAR more likely to have all sorts of social adaptation issues later on in life. They are far more likely to drop out of school, experiment with drugs, commit crimes, and even suicide. If it's a girl, she's far more likely to become a pregnant teenager. Of course, you're a superwoman, and YOU'D never have a child like that, right? Mom's own selfish example will NEVER be seen by the kid!

 

Oh wait, there's more!

 

Since you have such a great job, you can't afford to leave it and thus, you'll be back working within 6 months of having your kid. That means that while mommy's at work, someone ELSE will be raising the kid. I bet his first words will sound a lot like "mamma" in Spanish! Of course, you're not going to be getting any sleep for the first 3 years and you'll be among the walking dead at work, so your productivity will drop to zero, and your co-workers will have to pick up the slack for you. I'm sure they won't mind however, because you're a MOMMY! You'll probably experience added stress because your job will be in jeopardy and you may even need to cut back your hours.

 

Of course your social life will also drop to nothing because you need to be home taking care of the kid! What's that I hear? You're not going to stop partying? Well great for you! Bad for your kid however. Also, men are far less likely to date single mothers, so that drops your pool of potential fathers for your spawn even further! You'll be so overwhelmed with motherhood that you'll just have to settle for any guy that finally comes along and doesn't bolt because of your being a mom! Some "choice"!

 

Yes, there IS a whole generation that wants kids without any strings attached. That's exactly the problem! With kids come strings - you can't avoid it. So when the reality kicks in and you begin to realize just how selfish that is, you begin to hide it and look to idols to prove you were right all along. Look at Jaime Lynn Spears as an example. She's doing it right (just like her mother before her) and you KNOW how great the Spears girls turned out, right? Of course, that's only one example in a sea of examples!

 

Being able to afford having children doesn't make you a "mother" any more than having a function reproductive system does. That's just ridiculous!

 

Now, let's consider the alternative, shall we?

 

What if instead, you took the time and made the effort to work on yourself so that you were a better partner for the "1" so that when he comes along, he sees this and even sees his own unborn children in your eyes. Then, you two horn-dogs get together and have an incredible romance that lasts the ages, get married and have that same child. Now, not only does she have a father figure (and the respect of all the other fatherless children at school), but she has a mommy that is focused and concentrated on her well-being. Then, she grows up with a family full of love and support only to turn around and give that back to her own children because her parents weren't selfish, self-centered assholes?

 

Dare I dream?

 

Best regards...

------------------------------------------------------------------

Have a love, dating, relationship, sex or man/woman question? You can write to me by going to: http://beingaman.com/ask_question.asp for answers. For more information about my books, "Being a Man in a Woman's Worldtm" (volumes I and II), and other products visit: www.beingaman.com. Check out the new BAM! TV at http://beingaman.tv.

 

Copyright (c) 2008, Dr. Dennis W. Neder

All rights reserved.

 

At what age did you expect your children to wake him or herself up in the mroing?


When did you buy the kid an alarm clock and leave him or her to suffer the consequences of snoozing?

haven't yet and my oldest is almost 11. two reasons: one, they usually wake up absurdly early on their own; and two, when they don't i kind of like waking them up. i love how their first reaction to the new day is a smile. which is not my reaction when my alarm clock goes off....

American Innovative Teach Me Time! Talking Alarm Clock and Nightlight
American Innovative Teach Me Time! Talking Alarm Clock and Nightlight
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American Innovative was founded to pursue the development of innovative new products that should exist, but don't. "Products that make sense" is our motto and the execution of this philosophy can be seen throughout the company's product line. Teach me Time! is the educational bedside clock that advances as your child grows. From ages 3-5 Teach me Time!'s color-changing nightlight teaches kids to stay in bed until its "Ok to wake!" The nightlight timer is programmed to turn on and off at any time of the day. Parents can customize the "Ok to wake" time, when the glow color changes from yellow to green.... "Green means Go!" From ages 5-7, the Teach me Time! interactive, talking game helps school age kids learn to tell time on both anaolg and digital clocks. The game is designed to create a dialog between you and your child about time, keeping you involved in the learning process. The Teach Me Time! game is fully adjustable - five difficulty levels allow you to restrict which times are displayed (for example, just "round" hours) so that you can start simple and progress in difficulty as your son or daughter matures. For children ages 7 and above, Teach me Time! is a fully functional alarm clock with a snooze function- just like mom or dad's! Teach me Time! is white with interchangeable colored bezels (blue, pink & yellow included). Safety-certified external AC adapter and optional 2x AAA batteries (included). Teach Me Time! has been tested for lead paint content and has passed all related tests as defined by the ASTM F963-07 sec. 4.3.5.1 safety specification. Certified Frustration-Free Packaging Amazon.com has certified this product's packaging is Frustration-Free. A Frustration-Free Package is easy-to-open and comes without excess packaging materials such as hard plastic "clamshell" casings, plastic bindings, and wire ties. It is exactly the same as a traditionally packaged product--we've just streamlined the packaging to be opened without the use of a box cutter or knife and will protect your product just as well as traditional packaging during shipping. Products with Frustration-Free Packaging can frequently be shipped in their own boxes, without the need for an additional shipping box. Learn more.

Features

  • Teach Me Time! is an adorable child's bedside alarm clock, time-teaching tool, and dual-color nightlight all in one
  • Color-changing nightlight teaches kids to stay in bed until it's Ok to wake; parents program "Ok to wake" time, when glow changes from yellow to green
  • Clock is white with interchangeable blue, pink, and yellow bezels; face display options, volume, and brightness are adjustable
  • For children 7 and above, Teach me Time! is a fully functional alarm clock with a snooze function, just like mom's or dad's
  • Ships in Certified Frustration-Free Packaging
OK to Wake! Children's Alarm Clock and Nightlight
OK to Wake! Children's Alarm Clock and Nightlight
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Description

OK to Wake! Nightlight is programmable by the parent - you define what time the 'Green means GO!' light turns on in the morning. Kids take pride in waiting for the green light before they come visit you in the bedroom with the knowledge of a job well-done. In the evening, OK to Wake! is a comforting nightlight (soft yellow glow) that can be turned on at the tap of a 'toe' for a programmable duration (up to two hours). For older children that want to get up 'on their own', OK to Wake! is a fully-functional alarm clock with snooze - just like mom and dad's! A pleasant gradual-wake (ascending volume) tone gently rouses your child. When sounding, the left toe button snoozes for ten minutes and the right toe button silences the bell. Fun animations make OK to Wake! Come to life with smiles and winks whenever the alarm is sounding. OK to Wake! It includes a special built-in nap timer. Press a button to nap for up to 24 hours (fully customizable) without the other clock settings. And, best of all, the nap timer can conclude with the OK to Wake! light, the gradual-wake tone or both! OK to Wake! OK to Wake! volume and brightness settings are fully adjustable to meet the preference of you and/or your child. The OK to Wake! Alarm Clock and Nightlight Features: OK to Wake! glows green when it is time for young kids to go see mom and dad in the morning OK to Wake! includes a special built-in nap timer independent of the regular alarm settings OK to Wake! is a fully-functional alarm clock with snooze OK to Wake! comes with two interchangeable bezels? Bug and Flower Requires 4 AA batteries.

Features

  • OK to Wake! glows green when it is time for young kids to go see mom and dad in the morning.
  • OK to Wake! includes a special built-in nap timer independent of the regular alarm settings.
  • OK to Wake! is a fully-functional alarm clock with snooze
  • OK to Wake! comes with two interchangeable bezels: Bug and Flower.
  • OK To Wake! comes to life with fun animations of smiles and winks whenever the alarm is sounding.
Oregon Scientific RM313PNA Self-Setting Projection Alarm Clock with Indoor Thermometer, Blue
Oregon Scientific RM313PNA Self-Setting Projection Alarm Clock with Indoor Thermometer, Blue
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Description

The RM313PNA Blue ExactSet Fixed Projection Alarm Clock with Indoor Temperature makes going to bed or waking up fun! This cool member of the ExactSet family has all the amazing attributes of our other ExactSet clocks: it sets itself automatically, self-corrects for daylight saving time, projects the time in soft glowing red numbers on the wall or ceiling and now provides you with the indoor temperature! This cool and curvaceous clock not only looks good, but is easy to use and operate. The radio tower icon on the LCD screen lets you know your ExactSet projection clock is tuned in and receiving the super-accurate Atomic Clock time. Colorful design and split-second accuracy -- a combination of style and technology that is unquestionable!

Housed in high-tech blue plastic, this alarm clock is far more sophisticated than its cute appearance may lead one to believe. Whether you check on the time by consulting the clock's LCD screen or by looking at a large red-light projection of the time beamed onto a wall or ceiling, you'll know it's accurate. That's because the clock is equipped with a radio receiver tuned to the U.S. Atomic Clock, and keeps time with split-second accuracy by automatically adjusting, if necessary, to the Atomic Clock's signals six times every 24 hours. From those signals, the 5-1/4-by-4-1/2-inch clock (2-1/2 inches thick) not only shows the precise time, but also displays the date and day, with automatic adjustment for daylight-saving time and leap year, according to the North American time zone for which the clock is set. (The day can be shown in English, Spanish, or French.) The red-light projection makes it possible to check the time without squinting. If the clock is in battery mode (two AA batteries required but not included), pressing the clock's snooze bar will beam the time onto the ceiling for five seconds--and also backlight the LCD screen. If the clock is plugged into a wall socket with an AC adapter (included), the projection and backlighting will be available either for five seconds with the snooze bar or continuously if a continuous-beam control is set. As a backup, you can set the time, day, and date manually as well as automatically. --Fred Brack

Features

  • Fixed-projection alarm clock; beams time onto ceiling, either momentarily or continuously
  • Automatically sets and updates time/day/date with U.S. Atomic Clock
  • Clock updates to any North American time zone, shows chosen zone
  • Crescendo alarm with 8-minute snooze function awakens soundest sleeper
  • High-tech, blue plastic housing; 5-1/4 inches high, 4-1/2 inches wide, 2-1/2 inches thick
Stoplight Sleep Enhancing Clock
Stoplight Sleep Enhancing Clock
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Description

The Stoplight Sleep Enhancing Clock is a fun and simple way for toddlers to answer their own question, "is it time to get up?" At a young age, toddlers know their colors and understand that red means stop and green means go. The Stoplight Sleep Enhancing Clock features a friendly, beautifully-crafted sculpted figure next to a stoplight. The stoplight features red and green lights that can be easily set by parents. A digital clock and optional beeping alarm function are also included. When the red light is on, kids will understand that it is still time to sleep. When the green light turns on, kids will know that it is time to get out of bed. Recommended by pediatricians.

Features

  • Toddler sleep clock so little ones can easily tell when it is time to get up
  • Parent-set timer changes the red stay-in-bed light to the green get-up light
  • Digital clock and optional beeping alarm function included
  • Includes a friendly figurine with choice of bear or car
  • Measures approximately 7-1/2 by 4-1/2 by 8-1/4 inches
Digital Blue LEGO Alarm Clock Radio - Red
Digital Blue LEGO Alarm Clock Radio - Red
Sale Price: $48.95
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Features

  • LCD display with backlight
  • AM/FM radio with snooze
  • Battery backup feature
  • Exactly 10 times the size as actual LEGO
  • It is stackable
RiteAlarm 5-1-1 Triple Weekly Alarm Clock with Weekday, Saturday and Sunday Alarms, Extended Daylight Saving Time, Automatic Snooze, Simple and Meaningful Buttons, Adjustable Volume, Gentle Sound Pattern, Pushing Backlight and Battery Operated
RiteAlarm 5-1-1 Triple Weekly Alarm Clock with Weekday, Saturday and Sunday Alarms, Extended Daylight Saving Time, Automatic Snooze, Simple and Meaningful Buttons, Adjustable Volume, Gentle Sound Pattern, Pushing Backlight and Battery Operated
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Description

An Alarm Clock for Your Lifestyle with Triple Weekly Alarms: Weekly alarms include Weekday, Saturday and Sunday -- Alarm rings according to your regular schedule All active alarms displayed for easy tracking, or blank if deactivated Saturday alarm can also be single time use. You can also manipulate the date to get a single day weekly alarm or two continuous day weekly alarms, for examples, one Wednesday only alarm, or two Thursday and Friday alarms.Automatic Extended Daylight Saving Time (DST):RiteAlarmTM clock works with the new daylight saving time from March to November started in 2007. If yours doesn't work, upgrade now!Other Features for comfort and easy operation:No-shocking sound pattern and no-stress silent intervals Simple and meaningful buttons for easy adjustment Automatic snooze five times to wake you up Adjustable alarm volume to fit your sensitivity to noise Backlight display with a push of a button. Use two AA size battery for easy and stable operation, also safe for kids (batteries not included) Dimension: 4 inch X 3 inch X 1 inch

Features

  • Main Features: Very simple 5-1-1 alarm/display clock with automatic DST and adjustable volume
  • Unique triple alarms for weekdays, Saturday and Sunday, and Saturday alarm can be one-time only
  • Innovative "As Seen on Screen" alarm displays and easy on/off settings
  • It comes either with automatic Extended Daylight Saving Time (DST), or a submodel without DST
LEGO Alarm Clock Radio - Blue
LEGO Alarm Clock Radio - Blue
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Features

  • Alarm clock with AM/FM radio that is 10 times the size of the original LEGO brick
  • Digital LCD display with backlight
  • Large snooze button
  • Dual power option (battery backup)
  • Stackable with LEGO CD Boombox
Digital Blue Bakugan Red Alarm Clock Radio by Digital Blue
Digital Blue Bakugan Red Alarm Clock Radio by Digital Blue
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Features

  • Alarm clock with AM/FM radio
  • Status LED screen
  • Large snooze button
  • Nightlight function
  • Battery backup
Disney Princess Cinderella Bank Alarm Clock
Disney Princess Cinderella Bank Alarm Clock
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Description

Disney Princess Cinderella Bank/Alarm Clock in one. With easy to use alarm controls. Requires one "AA" battery (not included) Ages 3 and up.

Features

  • Bank & Alarm Clock In One
  • Easy to Use Alarm Controls
  • Quartz Accuracy
  • Requires One "AA" Battery (not included)
  • Ages 3 and up
Disney Princess 8 in Round Wall Clock
Disney Princess 8 in Round Wall Clock
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Description

Ideal for a Disney Princess themed room, add a little spice with this adorable Disney Princess Wall clock. Measures approximately 9 inches. Features quartz accuracy, easy wall mounting, and one year limited warranty. Battery operated. Requires 1 "AA" Battery (not included)

Features

  • measures approximately 9 inches
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